am i late or right on time?

So I'm waiting to go to an interview. I wrote down the interview in my planner but didn't write the exact time. I put it in the "3 p.m." category but that doesn't necessarily mean it's at three. I keep wondering if it's at 2:30.

you would think that a planner would make this whole "organization" thing easier.

ok laugh all you want. so it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that i'm bad at planning stuff.

And when it comes to important life stuff, i'm even worse.

I wonder if God just laughs when I say I want to follow Him but then I start making plans. Ok i'm not sure if I could really understand God's sense of humour, but He probably isn't jumping for joy when I start charting a course for myself.

...when i start planning ahead and not focusing on today.

Now obviously there's a need for organization. I bought a planner the other week because I'm not capable of remembering when I have meetings, classes, work and everything else. I blew off like 4 people the weekend before I bought the planner because I didn't write stuff down. Lesson learned--it's important (at least for me) to be organized.

But I wonder why I try to guess His will in the areas I can't very well organize. I think we all know those areas. The big "future" questions that every college student hopes to understand here and now.

So here's what I think...I think I'm a fool for saying that I want to follow Him AND I want to do "this and this" or have "this and this" in my life. A couple blogs have talked about mapping stuff and all that and it kind of hit home for me in the last 24 hours. I got whacked, my plans got scrapped and certain areas of my future over which I thought I had control are now slipping like grains of sand.

These plans are distractions. They are not good. They, for me, distract from where my focus should be. My focus is here, now, living and loving. My hope is in Christ Jesus. He is the only consistent truth in my life. He is the only one who will always remain faithful. He is steady and unchanging.

When my hope strays from that, I think the rest of me goes with it. I start looking for more rather than realizing that I am offered everything I need.

"The rich in spirit devote considerable time to thinking about what they don't have; the poor to enjoying and celebrating what they do have. In the last century the atheist philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche reproached a group of Christians with words to this effect: "Yuk, you make me sick!" When their spokesman asked why, Nietzsche replied, "Because you redeemed don't look like you're redeemed!" The rich are often as downcast, guilt ridden, anxious, and dissatisfied as their unbelieving neighbors. The poor cry, "It is right to give Him thanks and praise."---
blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven -- Matthew 5:3

I guess I'm just really trying to remember that He is steady and unchanging in every situation. I don't want to keep planning stuff. I'm not sure I do a very good job of it anyway.

perfect...it's time to go to this interview :)
have an awesome day!
-dave