farewell Maggie, Herschel, whatever else!!

couple things--

-Relay for Life is on Friday. If you don't have a team and want to take part, hit this link.

-Herschel's done. i just wanted to say thank you to him for being so willing to share his thoughts so openly. They were both challenging and encouraging.

- my sister is leaving for Argentina in like a day or so. It just seems so normal to me. It always feels like one of us is moving around. I'm really ok with it i think. I don't care so much about where I'm living or where anyone else in my family is living. As long as we are focused on Him, it doesn't matter how far apart we are.

I'm more excited for her than anything else because i know she has wanted to go back. so yes, Maggie, enjoy the trip and i will definitely be praying for you.

-I don't think i'll be using this thing much. Herschel's last blog hit me hard. I've been thinking about this blog for a couple months now and I haven't been sure of its purpose in my life. I haven't really used it as a means for communicating with my parents like i said i would. I don't keep in touch with long lost friends through this (not consistently). More importantly, for a long time now I've felt like my faith has been so wrapped up in words that I've lost focus on actions. I feel like I need to shut up a little bit.

So yeah. I feel awkward right now. Even though I shouldn't be, I would be lying if i said that i don't care about what other people think of me. To me, this looks like a bandwagon thing-- Like I'm leaving because Herschel is. Well, in part, that's true. His ability to let go of what seemed like a good thing really hit me hard. But the second sentence of this paragraph seems to sum up why i think I need to put this down. I'm more concerned with how I sound than with the truth. I am so self-conscious when it comes to what others think of what I'm saying. I don't think my focus has been on encouraging others or getting my thoughts down as much as it has been with "getting it right."

I think i need less confidence in what other people think of me, more in Him. Less focus on getting it to look or sound right and refined, more focus on letting Him use my clumsy brokenness. More focus on getting to know Him, less on talking about Him.

"Jesus said to Pilate, 'are you speaking for yourself, or from what others told you?'"

I dunno if this is a break or what. just don't expect too much.

love you guys. i see most of you on a daily basis anyway so it's not a big deal. For those of you who don't, shoot an email. I'm more than willing to talk one on one.

have an awesome day!!
-dave